The Evolution Of LaurenMessiah.com

In a few days, you are going to see a very different LaurenMessiah.com (I’m so excited!!). So before we say hello to my brand new website, let’s look back at all of the different versions of LaurenMessiah.com that have existed throughout the years.

 2015

I call this my “like a boss” website. With a Stella McCartney dress and a trophy case of press mentions – I mean business! Loved this version of my site, but I have evolved and as a result have totally transformed my business. That kind of transformation deserves a new look.
LM 2015

2014

For the 2014 version of my site, I wanted to focus more on content. I was dishing out daily blog posts and didn’t want you all to miss a single post (and why would you?)
lauren 2014

2012

This was my first upgrade after the original concept of LaurenMessiah.com. I had just expanded my content offerings to include more blog posts and for the first time, video.
LM 2012

2010

This is the first version of LaurenMessiah.com. I had just shut down my original brand (scroll down to see what that was). This version of the site means the most to me because I was flat broke when I built it with my designer. I was living off of unemployment and working towards getting my styling business off the ground. Probably one of my biggest purchases as entrepreneur (at the time).
LM 2011

2009

Before there was LaurenMessiah.com there was AskFashionKitty.com. I started my blog in 2005 and it was all about giving fashion advice and “virtually” styling people. Funny how things come full circle because when I started my site I had no idea that styling was even a career path that existed. Needless to say, my brand has changed A LOT since these days.

LM 2009

Thank you all for being a part of my journey and I can’t wait to show you what the new site looks like! Let the countdown begin.

OMG He Wore Dad Jeans On A Date

The day my Match.com account expired was the happiest day of my week – I’ll save you from the dramatics by saying it was the happiest day of my life.

This Match.com will likely my last, not because this guy is the man of my dreams. He was not. I will be meeting my future dates offline, at least for the immediate future.

To be fair, this wasn’t the worst date in the world (this one was) but it didn’t exactly go as well as it did in my mind.

The Man:

After a flurry of terrible prospects on Match.com, and a Tinder date who would not stop texting me. Receiving an email from attractive silver fox on Match.com made all of that past terror seem worth it.

He was attractive, an entrepreneur, a frequent traveler, into fitness, cooking, and just seemed like an all-around good guy. Sign me up!

Was finding love actually possible on Match.com? Maybe I needed to date a few trolls first, and this man was my reward.

The Look:

Prior to the actual date, he sent me three restaurant options to choose from and all three were pretty casual, some tragically so, and one looked hip enough to warrant a cute outfit.

I opted for a pair of white skinny jeans, a black peplum top (it worked well on a past date), and a pair of Manolo Blahnik heels. My makeup was simple and for accessories I opted for my classic Chanel bag and a ring.

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I felt sexy, and dressed up but not overly so for the setting. All in all, I’d say I was dressed for a successful first date.

The Date:

I arrived at the restaurant a bit early (that’s how I roll) and posted up at my usual right outside the restaurant spot so we could walk in together.

He’s late.

Seriously? I can’t stand it when people are late. He texted me 5 minutes later to say he was running late (uh, duh), so I waited. I’m weirdly getting nervous because you know, the whole hottie entrepreneur thing.

Well, the man who arrived was NOTHING like the man on the Match.com profile. This bait and switch bullshit is really starting to get old.

First of all, he was short. I don’t even care about height on a man but don’t tell me you are 5’11 when you are 5’8. Lies aren’t cool. When he walked up to me, he was like “oh you’re wearing heels …” Duh, mother f$cker! I work in fashion … HELLO!!

Second of all, he was wearing full on nerd glasses – ones a third grader would wear. Again, glasses can be hot but don’t lie!!!!

And the worst offense of all? He was wearing DAD JEANS!!! Dad jeans. Light wash, baggy, ill-fitting dad jeans. I don’t need a super fashionable man in my life, really I don’t, but dad jeans? I draw the line at dad jeans.

Of course that wasn’t THE line. He asked me out on a second date, I decided to have an open mind about it so I said yes. For the second date he waited until a few hours before to secure the plan. NOPE! Lauren waits for no man, you need to book in advance.

Next!

Takeaway Style Tips:

1.) Dress to the level of your environment: If you are going to a sports bar, don’t wear a cocktail dress. Dress up (always look your best) but do so in a way that still supports the dress code of your location.

2.) Wear heels: Listen, guys lie. They just freaking do. If their dating profile says 6’1, you better believe they are 5’11. Whatever they say, subtract one or two inches. Also, wear heels – it helps you see the truth.

I’ve Been Swept Into The Hype: Hermes Apple Watch

I never thought this could happen, not to me but … I want the Apple Watch!

When the Apple Watch first came out I laughed, I thought it was stupid, I thought I’ll NEVER wear that thing. I was extremely confident with this thought and had every intention of standing my ground.

Then it happened. I was teaching a class at School of Style, and I got tired of lugging around my phone during class. I need it to a.) tell time and b.) to get notifications on any urgent texts or emails (I am running a business after all). So I thought to myself, maybe I need to look into this Apple Watch business.

I seriously didn’t even know about the Hermes Apple Watch – so we can’t blame my love for fashion on this. However, when I found out about the partnership a few days later? It was on!!

The watch comes out on Monday, October 5th, and I MUST have it!!! Must. The question is, will I have to wait in line for it? Do I want it bad enough to wait on the sidewalk in the rain (I’ll be purchasing in New York)? Will I get my watch or will some tragic trolls who are just purchasing to sell on eBay beat me to the punch? Will I need to punch someone to get this watch? Kidding, kidding!!

Well, I just thought I would share, and I will keep you posted on my purchasing experience. Send out some fashion-prayers for me!

The Ultimate Wardrobe Checklist

When it comes to giving a person amazing style, there are some things that need to be in place. The first being is an open mind (you can’t style a person who doesn’t want to be styled), and two is a well-stocked closet with – what I call, wardrobe essentials. What are wardrobe essentials? They are the foundation pieces that every closet needs, no matter what your personal style is – the basics, if you will.

I recently developed the Ultimate Wardrobe Checklist for men and women. I uses these lists for all of my clients to see what they have and, more importantly, what they need.

If you know anything about me, a regular checklist would never do. That is why I teamed up with MOO to create a variety of fancy checklists using their half-page flyers.

With various wardrobe categories for men and women including tops, bottoms, denim, shoes, accessories, and more on one side – and stylish images on the other (using MOO’s Printfinity technology to make them all different) – I think they are stunning and incredibly useful. Aren’t they pretty?

Download yourself a free copy of the checklist for women here.  If you want the real thing printed on MOO‘s top quality paper, then you’ll have to see me at my Personal Styling class. The class is in Los Angeles on Nov. 7-8th, where I’ll be handing them out.

To step up your printed material game, head over to MOO.com to get all of your supplies in one stylish place.

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Stop Insulting Yourself and Learn How To Take A Compliment!

A few weeks ago, a client pointed out to me that I simply say “thank you” when given a compliment, and she was inspired by that. Admittedly, I was 100% confused – isn’t that what you’re supposed to say? She went on to say that most people say things like “nooo”, “this old thing?”, or give a nervous laugh when given a compliment.

She was so right, and that’s a real problem. Over the past couple of week’s I’ve been observing this phenomenon and boy do I have some stories to tell. For example, this past weekend I went to a wedding and was complimenting people on their outfits. Not one person could take a compliment.

For example, my client’s husband had on a suit. I told him he looked nice. He went on to tell me how the suit is terrible, he’s had it for 100 years, and no one likes it. I was like “well when you put it like that it doesn’t kind of suck.” But seriously I did tell him just let that be YOUR little secret and enjoy the fact that at least one person doesn’t think it’s terrible.

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A few hours later I ran into a friend; I told him he cleans up well. He went on to confess that the necktie he had on was seven years old, and too long so he jerry-rigged it with some tragic pin to make it shorter. Again … YOUR LITTLE SECRET.

Don’t even get me started on the women – not a “thank you” response in sight.

Here is the deal: When people compliment you, they are sincere, and you can sincerely accept the compliment with no excuses or stories to go with.

So next time someone compliments you, accept it. Stop insulting yourself and crushing your self-esteem by rejecting someone’s kind words towards you.

Can you do that or at least try it? Give a whirl and let me know how it goes!

Dressing for Darkness: My Match.com Date From Hell

After a few failed Tinder dates (read about one of them here), I decided to step my game up with a little Match.com action. I thought that Match.com was a reputable site filled with men who were ready to date. Silly me. Match.com has been the worst performer yet when it comes to my dating career. Match.com is where the world’s biggest weirdo’s come to settle down.

Match.com sucks.

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My worst date ever came from Match and also kicked off my “break” from dating. I should have known this particular date was doomed from the start. Why? I felt completely uninspired to choose an outfit (that never happens to me), and I ended up wearing a lackluster all black ensemble.

Let’s relive this nightmare, shall we?

The Man:

I’ll start by saying this; most of the men who message me on Match are either:

A.) Older than my Dad

B.) Have none of the qualities I stated I was looking for in a match

C.) Are hideous trolls (oh c’mon, looks do matter when it comes to online dating)

D.) Or they don’t even live in the state of California

So when this 40-something man with a nice physique, a sexy armful tattoos, a decent job, and what appeared to be a sense of humor, messaged me – I was game for a date. Yes, that was enough to qualify for a date with me. Match.com tends lower your standards without your consent.

We exchanged a few messages where he stated that he’d love to show me around Culver City where he recently bought a home. Now, in my opinion, a quality man comes to you, but since he seamlessly worked it into the conversation, I reluctantly agreed.

What can I say? The tattoos got me.

The Look:

The date was set for a Saturday night after I had worked a 12-hour-day teaching classes at my fashion school, School of Style. I had been on my feet all day and was so not in the mood for a date, but the date was set, and this could be the man of my dreams, right?

date outfit

I rushed home, took a shower, and started getting dressed. Was I to go with a dress or my deadly combination of a crop top and a pencil skirt? As I tried on outfit after outfit, I started to get annoyed with my date. Is this fool seriously making me drive to Culver City after I’d been working ALL day? This lack of consideration certainly didn’t deserve a skirt. So I opted for a new silk Rag & Bone racer back tank, leather skinny jeans, and Louboutin’s. Good enough.

Oh yeah, that’s me getting ready for this hellacious date.

The Date:

The date was set for 8:30 and I hate being late so I timed my drive so I’d get there at 8:15. I pull into downtown Culver City, and I get a text from Mr. Tattoo. He’s running late, can we make it 8:45?

Seriously, fucker? You LIVE in Culver City!! How are you running late?? I calm myself down; people run late – it’s okay.

It’s 8:35 and I am standing in front of the restaurant, which has an open front (you can see the outside area from the restaurant), waiting. Call me old-fashioned or crazy, but I feel like your date should walk in with you.  So I’m waiting, and waiting, and waiting. It’s 8:50. I decide to walk inside.

Jackass is sitting at the bar WATCHING me wait outside – this isn’t good.

We greet each other with a hug, and he looks nothing like his profile picture. The tattooed hottie was a gray-haired man with a Mohawk.  Not only were his looks not up to par; but he was also super rude!

How rude? This rude:

1.) He talked the ENTIRE time, and when I did manage to slip a word in, he literally turned away and started talking to his “friend” the bartender.

2.) Our date (after I had worked all day – he knew this) was all drinks and no dinner. Mind you I don’t drink. He also knew this.

3.) His “friend” the bartender called me Miss Boring because I don’t drink.

4.) Mr. Tattoo needed me to run an “errand “ with him, aka watch him give another bartender a mystery envelope.

5.) Some drunken blonde bimbo friend of his crashed our date where he went on to introduce me as a “Lauren, the teacher.”

Needless to say, I excused myself from this date almost immediately after it started.  Oh and he dare try to kiss me at the end of the night.

The good news it, a friend of mine called me right after and asked if I was wearing all black. I said yes (because I was). He said perfect; you’re on the list for a party, and you can only get in if you dressed in black.

Boom! I thought to dress in all black for a date, in this case, was simply dressing for my own dating funeral, BUT my wardrobe choice paid off in the end.

Takeaway Style Tips:

I’ll admit, I wasn’t a shining example of style on this date because I simply didn’t give a #*$%. It clearly didn’t matter because this guy was a total dud, but what if he wasn’t?

1.) Bring a backup piece of flash

I wore an all black outfit that was stylish (I can’t help myself) but I didn’t feel very special. Quick fix? Bring a special looking jacket or vest to throw on over your boring all black outfit.

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2.) Rock some sexy heels!

My Louboutin’s took my simple outfit to a date-worthy outfit. Always wear shoes that make you feel sexy on a date, always! I went on one date where I wore flats because I walked to the restaurant; wish I hadn’t done that because I didn’t feel my very best.

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3.) Make sure your makeup is on point

My face was winning on this date for sure. When you opt for an outfit that isn’t sexy-sexy or totally date-worthy, then you want your hair and makeup game to be on and cracking.

Take a Time Out! Why Dressing For Vacation Matters

lauren messiah maui tripI don’t vacation enough. There I said it. The truth is, I simply love my career so much that it’s difficult to take a time out from it.

The problem is, time outs are important.

I’m not talking about toddler time outs, I’m talking on full-on adult time outs where you take care of yourself and enjoy life. Oh, and working 24/7 doesn’t count – even if you love your job. I recently took a time out to Maui with a group of kick-ass women to celebrate a friend (and client’s) upcoming nuptials.

palm tree in maui

The trip got me thinking about a few things … 1.) Holy sh*t Maui is beautiful 2.) I need to travel more often, and 3.) People really need to start giving a damn about their vacation style.

lauren messiah maui trip

I’m sure it’s the fashion girl in me, but, to me, every occasion in life is an opportunity to dress up. Half the fun of dates, vacations, starting a new job, or even trying a new workout class, is finding an outfit to go with the experience.

So while in Hawaii I was blown away that such a beautiful island didn’t have people in beautiful outfits to match. Not a judgment call, just an observation that bugged the heck out of me. Why aren’t we dressing for our lives?

maui palm treesI am begging you to ditch that whole notion that in order to look your very best you need some sort of “special” occasion to dress well. Being alive is your special occasion, so you officially have permission to look good any day of the year.

lauren messiah maui trip

My challenge to you is on your next vacation, ditch the cut-off shorts and ratty tees shirts and go for something a little bit more special because you deserve it.

Please Don’t Kill My Vibe: Defining Your Personal Style

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We are all unique special creatures; there is no one else in the world that is exactly like you. This truth can apply to your looks, personality, and personal style, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t certain generalized buckets that we fit into.

Let me elaborate.

I’ll start with our looks, where we can fit into generalized buckets.  Hair (brown, black, blonde, red, gray), body type (watch these videos for more info), and even facial features are all generalized buckets.

Moving on to personality traits – you can fit in the funny bucket or the super serious bucket. Maybe you are peppy or sassy, generally speaking.

Do you catch what I’m throwing?

You are special, but you can still fit into “non-special” categories as a way to describe and define yourself. Same thing goes for personal style.

Having a style “bucket” that you fit into is the first step when it comes to defining a style that is personal to you.

For example, I consider myself an edgy classic. I have a certain edge to my style, which also happens to match my personality, but I also enjoy classic/timeless elements, which speaks to where I am in life and my age. However, another person who also calls their style “edgy classic” will likely dress completely different than me. Why? Because it’s MY personal style once those clothes hit my back.

So I challenge you to begin to explore your personal style.

Now I wouldn’t be the awesome personal stylist that I am without giving you a little push in the right direction now would I? Over the next few weeks, I will be sharing videos on seven different personal style types that I have developed for my clients. Take the style type that speaks to you the most and then make that style your own!

How do you do that? By coupling my guidance with your basic style instincts. I know, you think you don’t have basic style instincts, but trust me you do.

My VIP list gets the videos first; so make sure you are on it but signing up using this link. PS- you get a free book out of the deal. Score!

Get ready to get yourself a style vibe.

Watch the video series now>

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Like A Boss: Dressing for Respect in the Workplace

poster.original.1004x0 At this point in my career, it actually cracks me up when I hear people say that looks don’t matter. I laugh because I’ve heard it so many times, and it couldn’t be further from the true. Looks do matter. Get used to it!

Studies have shown that well-dressed people are more likely to get promoted at the workplace. There have also been various studies on people making snap judgments based on people’s appearances to determine their ranking, and ability to perform their jobs.

I mean, have you seen Devil Wears Prada? Notice how much more kick-ass Andy was at her job after her Chanel-infused makeover? I did.

If you think that only happens in the movies, then I am going to have to tell you just how wrong you are again. One client I recently worked with comes to mind; she is a badass movie producer, and she would get mistaken for a PA on set. Why? Because of her appearance, of course.  After our makeover, she was able to command the room without saying a word and was able to do her job more effectively because she automatically had that respect in place.

I find this to be especially true for entrepreneurs, myself included. If I am having a lazy fashion day, and I show up at a store to shop for a client, it is absolutely mortifying for a store clerk to mistake me for an assistant. My style needs to be on point at all times.

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Same goes for the days where I am wearing my COO hat at School of Style. I need to convey power and authority in my look because I own the business; I don’t work at it.

Are you dressing for respect at your workplace? My guess is probably not. Ask yourself these questions when you get dressed each morning for work:

–    Do I look like the boss or an assistant?
–    Would I promote me based on my look today?
–    Do I feel powerful in my look?
–    Would I be embarrassed if someone above me, or a client I’d like to have approached me in this outfit?

If you can get those answers to line up in your favor each day, then you are totally winning. You will find that you will quickly advance in your career, and you’ll have the people working for you giving you the respect you deserve.

#LikeABoss

Diary of a Dater: How to Not Waste A Hot Outfit On A Cold Date

Spoiler Alert: This story start with Tinder, so you know the ending can’t be all that great but you know it’s at least going to be a fun story.

The Man:

I’ve heard plenty of tales of Tinder resulting in loving, long-term relationships but right now I’m calling bullshit.  You see I first joined Tinder purely out of morbid curiosity. Tinder, this once deemed “hook-up” site was now the fresh, modern way to snag a mate.

I was sold. Swipe left for no, swipe right for yes, and when you both swipe right a love connection is made – or so I thought.

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For those of you who haven’t experienced the magic called Tinder; it’s filled with clichés, douche-bags, NFSW pics, and unsavory characters masquerading as the perfect man for you. Now I’m not completely bitter; there are some good guys on there too, but they are few and far between.

My second Tinder date ever had all of the qualities of a good one. You know, based solely on seven photos and a 3-sentence description of himself/ what he is looking for in a woman.  We matched, we chatted, he got my phone number, we exchanged a few texts, he set a date, picked two restaurant options, and a few days before confirmed the date. The day of, he re-confirmed and said he was excited about meeting me – so far, so good.

After I short series of dating disappointments, I knew not to get too excited about this one, but there is always a chance it will actually be a good one – so I had to dress to impress.

The Look:

Right before I booked this date (and the three others for the week – stay tuned) I went on a semi-insane shopping spree. Since deciding to put myself out there after a year of being single, I needed new single girl clothes.

lauren messiah date outfitTop by ALC, Skirt by Helmut Lang, Shoes by Manolo Blahniks, Clutch by Claire V

What are single girl clothes? Single girl clothes are pieces that make you feel confident, sexy, and are basically a fashionable trap to catch a quality man.

With a wardrobe bursting with single girl clothes, I decided on my no-fail combination, which consists of a crop top and some version of a pencil skirt aka a “booty spell” skirt.

I was looking good and feeling good, but then the thought came to me … “Am I wasting a hot outfit on what could potentially be a cold date?”

My solution: Put a jacket on it!

I added a structured blazer just in case this man wasn’t worthy of the hottie spell I was casting.

The Date:

We met at a trendy restaurant in Beverly Hills. I’d never been there before, so I arrived early to scope out parking and the scene. To my shock and horror, there were three entrances to this place. Three! I had no idea which door to enter, so I was hoping he would meet me outside. Nope! He texts to say he’s inside, at the bar, wearing a white dress shirt – well that really narrows it down. Sure I’d seen his picture but how reliable is a Tinder photo?? Luckily I was able to find him. I walked in wearing my jacket, you know can’t be too attractive in case he’s not.

My initial reaction was meh. His Tinder pics weren’t entirely accurate (c’mon, guys) and, wait for it, he shook my hand! I went in for a hug, and he went in for a handshake. Awkward!  Pretty pleased with my decision to wear the blazer so far.

We sit down at the bar for dinner. He is polite and orders for me but, of course, asks for my input. Win. He compliments my outfit and says I have great style. Okay fine, I’ll take the jacket off. Now I have his full attention.

As the date goes on, it doesn’t take me long to figure out that he is the headlining act of Snoozefest 2015.  Nice guy boring as all get out. I’m sure he’s a thrill a minute to another girl but not to me. The boredom coupled with a few other awkward moments (I’ll spare you the details) made it quite clear that there was ZERO chemistry.

Of course, this was a one-sided observation. As the end of the night nears, I could tell he was going to try to kiss me. What did I do? I popped that blazer back on. This girl is closed for business, Mr. Boring. The date ended with an actual hug and an apology for the handshake. Again, awkward.

He did ask me out on a second date and again complimented me for my amazing style. The second date didn’t happen, but I’ll be busting out this first date outfit again for hopefully a more exciting date.

Takeaway Style Tips:

1.) Bring a jacket!

Not only can dates get unpredictably cold (temperature-wise), they can appear hotter than they actually are. Cover up that sexy with some a blazer or a jacket.

blazer with dress

2.) Dress to impressive, even for the non-impressive

You never know how a date is going to turn out, so dress as if it’s going to turn out great. There is nothing worse than showing up slumpy and wishing you had stepped it up.

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3.) Own your feminine energy

Most women wouldn’t bust out a skirt for a first Tinder date but use your feminine energy to your advantage. I felt hot, sexy, and worthy of being desired – this helped me put my best foot forward on the date.

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