While the guy in the photo looks very cool, I see some practical problems with this. Namely, cats suck. They don’t like to be held, they scratch, and they’ll pee on you if you don’t succumb to their evil plans for world domination. Seriously — can you imagine trying to take a cat on a night out? Is there any way the two of you would make it home in one piece?

My proposed solution: stuffed cats. Get the look without the hassle. Go the child’s toy route if you’re into being cutesy, and, for the especially adventurous, stop into your local taxidermist to check out the selection. I dare you.